Multiplicity

I think there is a movie by that name. It's the story of a man who wishes there were more of him, and suddenly there are! So, I was thinking about that. I could certainly use more of me. Let's see...

1. I need one of me to take care of my house. This would include laundry, dishes, making beds (we do have little company often, you know), and the normal household chores. I believe Household Me would have time for grocery shopping, but if not, I'm sure we can whip up another me :)

2. The second me needs to take care of the outside. With an outside as big as ours is, I didn't feel it fair to put this on my household clone. Outside Me would take care of the porches, the arbor, the vegetables (don't choke...we really did plant some), and the flowers (I hear you sputtering-- stop it!) .This chick would also take care of washing the vehicles. She's a busy one!

3. The third me would be in charge of ZiZi's Stitch and Stick. This would definitely be a full time job, and therefore this clone would be unable to help out on other jobs. She would take orders, buy fabric, design items, sew, change thread...well, you get the picture. I would not see this clone very much because she would be constantly busy sewing and keeping the Den of Stitches clean.

4. The fourth me would be in charge of Carsyn. Now, this is no small task. Just yesterday, this happened:

Carsyn spotted a bag of candy she had left in the refrigerator. She ate all 8 Reese's pieces and looked for more. Then it happened--a nuclear meltdown the likes of which has rarely been documented: hands covering her face, massive tears, and screaming unintelligible words interspersed with "Nummy nummy!" "Moah!" "Anoah One!" And "ZiZi's baby!!" I would have taken a picture but I didn't take my phone into my fallout shelter. This is post fit/trip to store in the rain:

Obviously, this Me would need to be on her toes at all times, prepared with snacks, puzzles, a "nump nump" (trampoline--come on y'all-- get your toddler vocabulary on!), baby dolls, pop-tick (popsicles), and plenty of gas in the golf cart.

5. Cinco de Me (ok, I made that up) would handle Children's Church. Her time during the week would be spent studying the lesson, preparing craft and snack items, downloading and preparing songs and stories, and finishing the remodeling at church.

6. I would need one clone to help at the store. Country Farm Supply Me would be all over helping make orders, answering the phone, learning the ins and outs of the software, cleaning, putting up new stock, entering inventory in the computer, and making sure David does not completely dissolve from hunger (Thanks, Nannie, for the 911 run today).

7. This clone would be in charge of school stuff. See, you just think I'm not there, but that is far from true. So Number 7 would handle all school-related questions. She could, in fact, just stay at school. No need for the drive and extra gas it would take, right? Right.

8. Number eight would have the honor of handling ZiZi/Mama stuff. She would have all items for babysitting, toys in the house and yard, and would handle pick-up and drop-off. This ZiZi would never be tired and could always play because the other Me's would have everything else under control! She would be available for her children and could do anything for them, as well as for the grands.

9. Ninth Me is all about gymnastics. She would teach not only the classes we have now, but private classes as well. She would get to the gym early to set everything up for class and stay late to prepare for the next day. The refrigerator would always be full of water and gatorade, and the bathrooms would always be stocked and clean. She would have a computer at the gym and could record payments to make it easier on the owner, and she would take care of the leotards and t-shirt sales.


10. Tenth Me would have Robbie as her only priority. And that's all I've got to say about that (I typed that in my best Forrest Gump voice--could you tell?)

11. This Me is for Meeeeee!!! Baths at a decent time, plenty of sleep, walking every day, regular haircuts, and maybe just a little shopping would be right up this Me's alley.

12. Dozen Me would be a standby to fill in wherever the other 11 of me might fall short. Dozen Me will be a lifesaver in many ways. Who doesn't want an extra one of you to answer the phone while you're in the bathroom, or one to dry your hair while you are putting on your make-up? Yep, that's what I thought...

Now some of you might be thinking that we would be awfully crowded, but I don't think so at all. Each Me would have her own job, so her stamina would stay high, and her focus would be on one thing. We would stay out of each other's way because, again, our jobs would be specific. I'm going to be doing some research on this clone thing...I'm thinking life would be a lot easier with a dozen of me :)